HELLCATS QUARTERLY REPORT DHHL19 By The RAM Katmandu, NEPAL- It has been a season of disappointment and rumoured changes. On the ice, there has been little or no magic. The magic and cohesiveness that the team saw last season is nowhere to be found in DHHL19. Last season G Jeremy Duchesne surprised the league by winning the Vezina. This year, he is nowhere to be seen in any leading goalie stats. The team is presently playing .500 hockey and will no doubt make the playoffs. But if the team doesn’t start to show some of magic that it did last season, there’s no hope for this season. On offense, the team does have a few bright spots. On the league’s top 15 scoring list, we find 3 Hellcats there. LEADING SCORERS PLAYER TEAM GP G A PTS +/- PP SH GW GT S PCT Chuck Norris BOSTON 20 12 20 32 7 8 1 0 0 73 16.4 Lucas Drake MIAMI 18 18 9 27 6 6 3 2 0 95 18.9 Bobby Heenan TOAD SUCK 19 12 15 27 11 9 0 1 1 55 21.8 Todd White PORT HOPE 21 8 19 27 -8 4 2 0 0 65 12.3 Brad Moran BOSTON 20 10 16 26 6 6 0 1 0 48 20.8 Rob DiMaio PORT HOPE 21 17 8 25 -10 6 0 1 0 68 25.0 Morten Madsen WINNIPEG 21 13 12 25 -4 5 0 1 0 76 17.1 Kris Vernarsky KATMANDU 21 9 16 25 9 1 0 1 0 67 13.4 Lukas Kaspar TOAD SUCK 19 15 9 24 10 0 1 1 0 62 24.2 Brooks Laich DENVER 19 12 12 24 12 6 1 0 0 61 19.7 Lasse Pirjeta TOAD SUCK 19 12 11 23 4 6 1 3 0 81 14.8 Homer Simpson KATMANDU 21 12 11 23 4 3 0 2 0 52 23.1 Lauri Tukonen KATMANDU 21 12 11 23 12 0 0 1 0 62 19.4 D.Afanasenkov THUNDERBAY20 10 13 23 10 0 0 2 0 57 17.5 Umberto Eco PETERBORO 21 8 15 23 6 5 0 1 1 82 9.8 Kris Vernarsky is once again leading the team and aging donut lover, Homer Simpson, is on another one of his diet modes. Young Lauri Tukonen seems to be on the verge stardom. On defense Ryan Suter is the go to guy. Ryan is on the ice for all PP and PK situations and plays on the teams #1 defensive pairings. He also sits tied for 6th place offensively in scoring for defensemen this season. LEADING DEFENSEMEN PLAYER TEAM GP G A PTS +/- PP SH GW GT S PCT Paul Dunphy PORT PERRY19 8 15 23 18 1 0 0 0 21 38.1 Shawn Belle LOSANGELES19 6 16 22 9 2 1 0 0 28 21.4 Trevor Daley LOSANGELES19 4 18 22 9 1 0 1 0 29 13.8 David Hale GLADIATOR 19 5 15 20 12 2 0 0 0 23 21.7 Tom Preissing PORT HOPE 21 3 17 20 -11 1 0 0 0 30 10.0 Ryan Suter KATMANDU 21 5 14 19 8 1 0 1 0 31 16.1 Marek Zidlicky WINNIPEG 17 5 14 19 0 0 0 0 0 35 14.3 Steve Montador GLADIATOR19 4 15 19 14 1 0 1 0 21 19.0 Martin Grenier DETROIT 21 1 18 19 5 0 0 0 0 26 3.8 Kurt Sauer MIAMI 18 2 16 18 -1 0 0 0 0 21 9.5 Roman Tesliuk PETERBORO 19 1 17 18 6 0 0 0 0 13 7.7 Shea Weber DENVER 19 6 11 17 2 1 0 1 0 31 19.4 Dave McCullochPORT PERRY19 5 12 17 12 1 0 2 0 18 27.8 Ivan Majesky GLADIATOR 19 3 14 17 7 0 1 0 0 22 13.6 Kyle Wharton MIAMI 18 2 15 17 9 0 0 0 0 25 8.0 Off the ice. Attendance has been way down this season, including the 2nd half of last season. Prompting the rumour that the Hellcats could be on the move following this season. Turmoil in the country of Nepal, is said to be the reason for the attendance problems. Even ticket giveaways are not bringing in the fans. Many Maoists have refused to give up their violent ways and continue to strike fear and distrust in the people as a whole. It is reported that GM Drummond has confided in a few close friends and colleagues that the ongoing problems in Nepal, if they don’t find a way to stop it, will force him to move the Hellcats to another city. There is believed to be 3 possible destinations. London, England. Manheim, Germany and Anchorage, Alaska. More on this as it develops. League News The Toad Suck Toasters have turned a corner after many seasons of being an average team. The Toasters are tied for 1st place with Waco at 26 points. They are also the 1st team to reach 100 goals on offense. It looks like the league is headed for year of reduced scoring. The Toasters look like the only team that may reach 400 goals. DHHL13 was the last year in which there was no team that reached 400 goals, it may happen again. GP W L T GF GA PTS PCT LAST 10 STREAK TOAD SUCK 19 12 5 2 100 66 26 .684 7-2-1 2G winning WACO 21 11 6 4 78 78 26 .619 5-1-4 2G winning GLADIATOR 19 12 6 1 80 67 25 .658 6-3-1 6G winning THUNDERBAY 20 11 7 2 84 77 24 .600 6-3-1 2G losing DETROIT 21 10 7 4 85 72 24 .571 5-3-2 1G losing PORT PERRY 19 11 7 1 88 75 23 .605 4-5-1 2G losing PETERBORO 21 11 9 1 92 81 23 .548 7-3-0 4G winning BAY CITY 19 10 7 2 77 79 22 .579 4-5-1 1G losing KATMANDU 21 10 10 1 87 80 21 .500 6-4-0 1G winning MONTREAL 18 9 7 2 66 62 20 .556 3-6-1 1G winning LOSANGELES 19 8 7 4 78 79 20 .526 5-4-1 2G losing MIAMI 18 9 8 1 95 80 19 .528 5-4-1 1G winning WINNIPEG 21 8 10 3 88 97 19 .452 4-5-1 3G winning HALIFAX 17 8 7 2 61 67 18 .529 3-6-1 3G losing DENVER 19 9 10 0 73 76 18 .474 6-4-0 2G losing PICKERING 20 7 12 1 85 87 15 .375 4-6-0 2G losing CALGARY 20 6 11 3 65 82 15 .375 3-6-1 1G losing BOSTON 20 6 13 1 75 92 13 .325 2-7-1 2G winning WHITEFISH 19 5 12 2 53 66 12 .316 2-7-1 1G winning PORT HOPE 21 4 16 1 77 124 9 .214 2-7-1 4G losing Rookie Scoring It is a very lean year for rookies. Player Team GP G A PTS +/- PP SH GW GT S PIM PCT Jeff PETRY BC 19 2 14 16 -5 1 0 0 0 16 38 12.5 Keith SEABROOK KAT 21 1 11 12 -1 0 0 0 0 15 17 6.7 Shawn MATTHIAS GLA 19 6 3 9 5 0 0 2 0 34 25 17.6 Nikolai KULEMIN CGY 20 1 3 4 -3 0 0 0 0 38 41 2.6 Ben MAXWELL PIC 20 2 1 3 1 0 0 0 0 7 66 28.6 Blake GEOFFRION WPG 4 1 2 3 -2 0 0 0 0 16 6 6.3 Milan LEDUC BOS 20 0 3 3 0 0 0 0 0 14 47 0.0 Artem ANSIMOV HAL 7 0 0 0 -3 0 0 0 0 6 4 0.0 In past years, at this point of the season, there were always more than just a few players that stood out. This year there are just 3. Defensemen Petry and Seabrook and centreman Matthias. This is the Ram, reporting for the Nepal Weakly.